Sexual Patterns

On and off line Sex is always attracts people's interest. When we talk about it, we often laugh, share experiences, or cry over lost lovers.

Sex is part of our experience as physical beings.

Sex can be enlightening, fun, painful and more.

You should not have sex with anyone unless you feel comfortable with that partner. You won't have good sex if you are not ready and comfortable.

The energies of sex, combined with the heightened frequencies of love and romance, can bring us to great heights as its passions motivate us in the arts, music, writing and all areas of our lives.

Sex, and how we deal with it, varies throughout our lives and with the partners we meet.

The sexual patterns one follows are general instinctual, tempered by the society in which they live.

There are rules when in the 'world', but when it comes to sex, there are sometimes no rules, as we quest and conquer [this is meant in a positive way].

At puberty the hormones 'explode', as if a time bomb. Then again, everything in our genetic make-up, which gives our experiences in 3D, including our awakening to the spiritual changes that are occurring now, are triggered as if by genetic time capsules, our activating DNA. They do not let us forget we are in a human body, as we meet partners we are attracted to, during our lives.

What we enjoy during a sexual encounter, varies with our personal and physical needs. TNT, Techniques 'n Timing!

Some couples play 'head games', while others get right to it and meet just for sex. This is often because they know what they want and how to satisfy each other.

Some couples prefer a 'quickie' while some enjoy prolonged sex that lasts for hours.

Compatibility is the Key! Communication before you begin is important, although some couples just blend together as if they intuitively know what will please them.

Variety is the Spice of Life, sexually that can include a variety of partners, a variety of positions, varying the things done with a lover, exploring new options and things that turn us and our partner on. There are many variables, the most important for most people is their satisfaction and that of their partner.

Sexuality can be great with one partner or multiple partners, group sex, as long as it is what everyone wants. Never get forced into a sexual situation that makes you uncomfortable, yet you are doing it to please your partner.

How often one should have sex? How long sex should last? This varies with each person and partner. A couple can have a quickie if busy, then spend hours having sex, as time permits. In our busy world, there is often not enough and time and energy for lots of sex.

Sex with only one partner in a lifetime, is no longer the normal, again this varies within cultures. We change our partners as we change and grow in our time in the physical. Many straight people turn gay.

Did you know that Ken and Barbie have spilt up after 43 years of ageless romance?

Many couples enjoy romantic sex that opens the heart, great ambiance, music, lighting, dancing, whatever and wherever the moment takes them.

Friends and Lovers

Often friends become great lovers and go on to enjoy many happy sexual years together.

In some cases, the passion dies and lovers become friends.

To keep both the energies of friends and lovers alive and healthy, is not easy to do over a lifetime, but it can be done.

Metaphysics and Sexual Energy

Often it would seem that those who cross over into the world of metaphysics, desire a partner of like mind/frequency to share their journey. They want someone beyond the 3D issues, someone who understands and can share their journey, and can love freely with an open heart. Each year more and more souls awaken from their of cocoon of sleep and metamorphosis into spiritual beings of light. Yet not all of these souls will find a soul mate of like mind. Some will not need the union, others will be disappointed, while many will find short, or in rare cases, long term relationship, the sexual energies become a union of body, mind, and soul that is electric.

Electricity, EM energies, take us to the aura. If you see and read auras - you can 'physically see' that someone has had sex, as it is in colors and energies of their aura.

If you are in love or lust, or into your spiritual growth

the best sexual encounters are those in which the partners combine body, mind, and soul.

Spontaneity, mixed with some lustful passion, is the Key with many couples.

Sex can be a blissful act in which the union brings enlightenment and understanding.

In a candle lit room, or while engaged in sex, couples can see themselves as they were/are together in other experiences. The soul can cross over and experience on more than one level at a time. Past lives together can be viewed.

Union with ones Spirit Guide, the part of your soul that waits for you on the other side, your polar opposite, can occur in some cases, heightening the experience, and creating a union of self.

There are websites about Tantra and Tantra Sex, that explain their use of this energies as it relates to sex.

Never Having Been Sexual

In some cultures people remain virgins until they marry. If for some reason, they never marry, they may never experience sex.

These people often fantasize about lovers, or masturbate.

But when someone never addresses their sexual needs, the reasons go much deeper, they are in denial, and need to consult a therapist.

Don't bury yourself in your work, in a book, with family matters, watching TV, or other activities.

Sexual development is part of the equation.


Most people know they are gay from their teenage years. You know who 'turns you on'.

Gay issues should be addressed as early as is comfortable to the person. There is often personal denial, especially if there is no one to talk to.

There are cultural and family reasons why gay activities remain hidden, but the soul needs to express its sexuality as it is part of our experience here in 3D.

Today we are becoming more open about homosexuality.

The Internet helps people find and understand that part of their experience.

Flirting and Teasing

Flirting is part of the mating experience.

It can be fun and harmless and make a other-wise boring day, fun.

People flirt everywhere, especially in the workplace.

But girls be aware...teasing a man too much on a date, can send mixed messages, and result in date rape.

Duality and Reality, Sex

As all things in our reality have duality, we come to the negative aspects of sexual behavior, by those who suffer from mental illness and emotional and physical abuse.

For some people sex is some they do that brings gratification but it sometimes leads to OSA, Obsessive Sexual Addiction. OSA does not mean you want and enjoy lots of sex, it means you are obsessed with having sex, alone and with partners, and think about it constantly. OSA is often accompanied by a Porn Addiction, and abusive patterns with partners. Sexual addiction hurts both the addict and the addict's loved ones. It tears apart families and destroys lives, striking at the core of relationships and human intimacy. Again there are support groups for those who seek help.

There are many deviant patterns in sex. This goes to rape which is a violent act, generally stemming from the person's issues and mental imbalance. Rape is an act of violence and control, not sex. We generally think of rape as men abusing women, but rape exists where women violate men, and often in gay male situations this becomes violent, especially in prison or others places where mentally people are confined.

Men rape women and men rape men.

Acts of rape / sexual abuse can involves fondling, oral, or penetration by the penis or an object.

Date Rape is far more common than is reported, with no witnesses and the word of one person against the other. Proving a rape is not easy especially if the accuser is not balanced. A man who does this to one woman, will do it again. So please do not be afraid to report this incident, especially if you have bruises to prove it. Rapists always strike more than once.

Childhood rape is abuse taken to the max! It often leads to multiple personality disorder, MPD. Remember that the Child, is the Emotional Body. This abuse can begin at any age, even infancy. Childhood rape, especially if it is repeatedly done by a parent or someone in the household, leaves emotional scars that may never go away, as what is done to us in childhood, impacts on how we deal with the rest of our lives. It takes years to get over the abuse suffered in the first 20 years of someone's life, the scars often never healing. There are many websites about rape and support groups that can help you recover.

It would seem that our adult lives are often about recovery from childhood experiences, guilt, fear, anger and all the negative emotions.

What has become a sad pattern is people with mental illnesses claiming to have been sexually abused in childhood, when they were not. It is often a device someone uses to get back at a family member who they blame for their dysfunctional lives. Not all claims of childhood sexual abuse are real, but all cause havoc. Often the person making the accusations, will come forward and say they lied, or misinterpreted the events. To a child, a hug can be viewed as a sexual act.

If you were sexual abused in childhood, you are more likely to become a sexual abuser, to help you understand issues, and perhaps as an acquired pattern of behavior. This often goes along with patterns of drinking and drugs.

Wives are often raped and beaten, but are afraid to get help and leave, until they cannot take it any more, at which time they either kill their husband, or run away, usually with their children. A woman who stays with a men who rapes and abuses her, loses the respect of self, the man, her children, and anyone who tries to help her and she pushes away. Again this goes to issues of culture, self esteem, and fear.

STD, Sexually Transmitted Diseases, are another issues couples need to discuss and be honest about. this is not always the case and so ignorance diseases often frightens off would-be lovers. Again, there is much you can read on the Internet about these health issues.

Older Couples

If you are older and think that love and passion can no longer be part of your experience, think again.

Older men and women, who are passed the pressures of work and career, now have Viagra and can be great lovers. If the chemistry is right, they won't need an aid to help them.

Women can keep themselves attractive, and find love and sexuality at any age.

Of course this goes to issues of health with senior citizens and the simply skill of communication, which many had never developed when they were young.

You can be yourself now...just find out the best ways to do it!

One more thing about seniors and sex ... there is a high rate of SDTs and urinary tract infections (UTI's) among seniors.

Valentine's Day Is National Condom Day

1010 Wins NY - February 14, 2004

For most of us today is Valentine's Day, but for those romantics at the city's Health Department, today is National Condom Day.

And while many sweethearts will be buying candy and flowers, the Health Department suggests you "BYOC" or "bring your own condom."

Health Commissioner Thomas Frieden reminds all sexually active New Yorkers to practice safer sex by using condoms, and to also know their own and their sexual partner's HIV status.

Dr. Frieden says that "National Condom Day is another reminder that condoms save lives." And he cautions that one in four New Yorkers with HIV don't know they are infected with HIV, the virus that causes AIDS.

In your physical journey through Emotion and Time, I hope you find a partner who is compassionate, loving, and blends with you sexually. You owe it to yourself to find someone who can share with you at that level, no matter how long the relationship lasts. Whatever your pleasure is ...I hope you find bliss on all levels!