June 2006

We are forever seeking the truth about who we are and where we came from.

There's an interesting pattern in my readings to date having to do with people who are adopted.

Actually, many people wonder if they are adopted, feeling no connection to the people who raised them.

As we come to Father's Day, it is interesting to get their perspectives on their adoptive and biological parents.

Love seems to be there in all cases of the adopted children I read. They felt loved and wanted as they grew up, some raised in homes where the adoptive parents already had children of their own and wanted to take in others who are homeless.

Some were adopted from overseas agencies, while others were born in the US.

Some were adopted with another biological sibling.

All felt connected more to the adoptive family whether they had found their biological family or not.

Thanks to the Internet some had found their biological mothers but did not know the whereabouts of their fathers.

Many embrace the energies of both families, their karmic connection being more with the adoptive family.

There are many scenarios pro and con for adoption, yet most of the people I have read through the years feel they had a better upbringing than had they been raised by biological parents, who did not want them, were unable to care for them, or forced to give them up for adoption.

There are many variables with adoption, but I do believe DNA is the key. Finding out the genetic code of biological parents will bring understanding to the patterns of behavior the child will develop. If the genetic codes involve mental illness, alcoholism, etc. the child will, in most cases, follow that pattern, and have a dysfunctional life.

There are as many risks for adults as there are for the children, especially in the case of mental illness or other handicaps they cannot handle which may become too overwhelming in an age where the lessons are about self awareness and finding balance in one's life in a world seemingly gone mad.

Some of my adopted clients seek reunion with their biological parents. The rest feel it will not change anything and don't care.

Father's Day can push buttons as families come together and do not share the same views, adopted or not. This goes to fathers and their issues, old and new, and how they have influenced their children's lives. Issues ... issues ... issues ... In a world of marriage, remarriage, step-parents who adopt children, things can get interesting and often confusing, yet most people know who their father figure is and will honor him accordingly. He is the man who is there for you and is not abusive. Not everyone is equipped for parenting. Think long and hard before you make that choice.

Email from a male reader who was adopted ...