The Breaking Up Letter


January 2009

We live in an age where we write things down in email, text, journals, and even letters that get mailed out.

The Break Up Letter creates a catharsis in which people can express what is in their heart after trying to maintain the energy in a relationship that no longer works.

They have tried and tried again, gone to therapy, had endless phone calls and discussions and whatever else couples go through when they know the relationship has changed and they have to move on.

Now it is time to express one's feelings in a letter. Sometimes the letter is delivered, other times it is just for the person writing it. It addresses issues and helps some people clear. It also allows people to understand how they behave in a relationship and why they attract the partners they do.

I have also noticed that sometimes people express themselves two different ways. They can act one way in person or on the phone, then become a totally different person in email, as if the latter is a way to vent. It all comes down to issues and coping skills.

If you need to write The Break Up Letter after all else has failed, go for it. You might want to start with a rough draft. You could just sit there and channel it from your heart, as if automatic writing.

When all is said and written ... please respect the fact that your partner deserves to hear your truth and to express their own thoughts in person, connecting through the eyes. Break up letters are one of the easiest ways to handle a break up, especially for those who are not confrontational, but may also leave a huge mess behind. If you want to stay friends, take the high road and tell them in person.





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